the elephant in the room
An obvious problem or sensitive issue everyone notices but no one wants to talk about.
Popularized by the idea that a huge elephant in a room would be impossible to miss, yet people might pretend it isn’t there. Often traced to a 19th‑century fable/parable; the modern phrasing became common in 20th‑century English.
Used for a conspicuous issue people avoid discussing. Often implies discomfort, denial, or avoidance, and sometimes a push to address it. Common in meetings, politics, and family situations.
-
Everyone kept talking about the budget, but the elephant in the room was the CEO's sudden resignation.
-
At the family dinner, the elephant in the room was our ongoing argument, and no one wanted to bring it up.
-
Before we plan the launch, we need to address the elephant in the room: the product still crashes sometimes.
-
The elephant in the room during the meeting was that our biggest client might leave.
-
They joked around, but the elephant in the room was that nobody trusted the new manager yet.
Typically used as a noun phrase with the definite article: “the elephant in the room.” Common patterns: “X is the elephant in the room,” “address/talk about the elephant in the room.” Variants include “the elephant in the room is…”; rarely pluralized unless multiple issues are meant.
- the unspoken issue
- the big issue no one mentions
- the problem we’re avoiding
- the gorilla in the room
- clear the air
- address the issue
- put everything on the table