come to grips with
Meaning
To begin to understand, accept, and deal with a difficult reality, problem, or emotion.
Origin
From the literal sense of getting a firm hold (grips) on something, or grappling in wrestling; metaphorically, to get control of and handle an issue.
Notes
Suggests facing something directly and starting to handle it; implies acceptance plus action, not just awareness. Neutral to serious tone; common in formal writing and speech.
Examples
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It took me months to come to grips with my father’s death.
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The company is still trying to come to grips with the new regulations.
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After the accident, she had to come to grips with the fact that she couldn’t run anymore.
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We need to come to grips with the real cost of maintaining this system.
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He finally came to grips with his anxiety and started seeing a therapist.
Grammar & Usage Notes
Usually followed by a noun/gerund: come to grips with the problem/with losing. Tense varies (came/has come). ‘With’ is fixed; often used with ‘finally’/‘need to’.
Synonyms
- come to terms with
- face up to
- deal with
- confront
- get a handle on
Antonyms
- ignore
- avoid
- shy away from
- sweep under the rug